cats are so fake like they’re theoretically related to apex predators and yet they weigh 8 pounds, sleep 20 hours a day, and scream if you feed them half an hour later than usual
I deeply sympathize because I also like to sleep an unreasonable amount and yell when hungry.
incidentally, you are also an apex predator
apex predators are over-hyped, we’re all just tired and whiny.
it amuses me to see people being surprised/impressed/amused by this setup, because it’s extremely common on the plains. if you don’t plant a windbreak, your heating and cooling bills are huge, and storms do things like throw the lawnmower through the living room window, take the roof off, or cake the entire north side of the house with six inches of solid ice.
evergreens remain bendy even in the coldest weather, so – wait, no, not the coldest. i remember when i was a kid it got down to like -45 and the norway pines around my house were cracking like gunshots as the sap froze.
maples, incidentally, make that noise around -20f, and i hear it at least once every winter here in southern minnesota. but i only ever heard norway pines make it that one time.
so anyway that’s why we plant pine trees around our houses. because otherwise the wind would freaking kill us.
This is informative and perfectly sensible under the circumstances but I also cannot resist the temptation to compare it to planting stuff all around the boundary of your lot in The Sims
i think one of my favorite thing about bob’s burgers is bob’s complete lack of gay panic (or transphobia, depending on how you interpret marshmallow’s gender).
- bob picks up transvestite hookers in his cab. they good-naturedly flirt with bob, and he just good-naturedly flirts back (”hey, who’s picking up who?”)
- linda makes a joke about him being gay for torpedo jones, and there’s no declaration of “what no i’m not gay!!!!” or even a hint of acknowledgement of bob’s heterosexuality.
- he’s gotten into some weirdly, awkwardly homoerotic moments with mr. fischoeder and seems more amused than anything else.
- marshmallow shows up in the restaurant, and linda gleefully declares it a fulfillment of a premonition of a “tall, dark and handsome” visitor. bob points out “marshmallow’s not handsome, she’s beautiful!”
- louise suggests bob wishes to marry sandy “can can” frye and become “bob can can.” bob’s response is to simply scoff, “i wouldn’t take his name.” no mention of “i’m not gay, louise.”
- gene may be canon genderfluid, or he may just be experimenting with life, but either way, bob has never once told him to “man up” or that he can’t, say, dress as queen latifah for halloween, be in a girl group or identify himself as bob’s daughter. sometimes you see him thinking “man, my kids are weird,” but he rolls with it every time.
i’m sure there are other examples i’m forgetting, and it’s part of a larger reason i like this show; the fact that people by and large treat each other with respect (even louise, agent of chaos, wouldn’t out a kid as a bedwetter). and it’s still funnier than anything else on television.
the conversation with the deli worker in the supermarket during the thanksgiving episode is basically concrete proof that bob is bisexual
Someone: “I want a cat/rabbit/other animal that will be super openly affectionate, go for walks, play fetch, not mind being handled rough, never be shy, and also I don’t want it to claw me or the furniture(so I’ll probably get it declawed) and I don’t want to ever clean a litter box or cage.”
Me: “Hey there’s this great new type of animal you might be interested in:”
Someone: “I want a dog but I don’t ever want to take it for walks or exercise it very much or let it outside and I want it to be fine with being left alone for longer periods of time and also never bark.”
Me:
Someone: “I want a cat or dog but I want to only feed it a vegan diet.”
Me:
Someone: “I want to have a pet but I basically never want to interact with it.”
Me:
Someone: “I want to get my kid a cute pet for Easter/Christmas!”
Me:
Get a pet that fits your needs. Don’t get a pet then try to force it to fit your lifestyle. Just because you saw a person walking a rabbit once doesn’t mean you can expect a rabbit to just be a dog. Just get a dog!
